Maschoolital

I had a dream last night. It was mostly about me craving Gandolfo's. I miss it and since the only location in WA is all the way in Redmond I haven't had a Gandolfo's sandwich since before I moved away from Provo in August. Anyway, you'll never believe where I finally found one in my dream. It was in the food court inside a Maschoolital. The building was part mall, part school and part hospital. It was everything I loved and hated all rolled into one building. I shopped, worked (mostly kept having to search for my students in the mall portion) and avoided doctors all night trying to find Gandolfo's. And I finally did. But woke up right before I got to eat my sandwich! Tragic!!!

Weathering the Storms

It's been a while. But for those of you who listened to my record backwards and heard "Em is dead," rest assured. It was just a hoax. I wasn't really dead.

Washington has been in the news a lot lately. Two weeks before Christmas we were hit by a huge storm. It was hurricane-like in nature and wiped out power in millions of homes. Some of them (including my home town) were without power for almost two weeks. When I listened to the local radio stations I heard people calling in and begging for help. There was no electricity and in some areas there wasn't even water. And temperatures dropped to all-time lows. Several people died from drowning, electric shock, being crushed by trees, carbon monoxide poisoning, etc. Me? I never even lost power. My cable went out for about 10 minutes during the storm, though. Life is hard.

After that, there came Christmas. At least, I think it happened. I have a new GameCube in my apartment. So something happened. But it wasn't the same. Most of the stores were closed for several days before Christmas so shopping was a no-go. Almost everybody's Christmas lights wouldn't glow. And then, of course, there was no Grandma. That sucked.

On the plus side, over Christmas break (I mean Winter break...) I got my own classroom. Before I was sharing a classroom with another teacher and it was divided in half with bookshelves. It was horrible and I hated my life. But now I don't hate it as much.

Today I didn't hate it at all. We're in the middle of another storm. A snow storm this time. And there was no school today. And by the look of it outside right now, there's a huge possibility that my unexpected vacation will be extended by another day tomorrow. Hurray!

Back to my GameCube...

Let It Snow!

I love the snow! Snow, snow, snow! It's so pretty. And although it's wet and cold and slippery, it possesses a power I can't help but love... the power to get me out of having to go to work. In the great Northwest we have lots of hills and our snow is of the wet variety which easily freezes into ice (and it's evil twin "black ice") which would be stupid to drive in. So lots of schools and places of business will close their doors for safety reasons. And what's safer than sitting in your own living room in your new Christmas Snoopy pajamas drinking hot chocolate and watching your favorite Christmas movies? Nothing, my friends. Nothing is safer than that. So tonight I pray for snow!

Ticket Please

We had an assembly today to celebrate the end of this year's fundraiser. A counselor got his head shaved. Another counselor got her hair dyed red. A teacher got his beard shaved. Another teacher gave away a shopping spree. The kids were excited about going. The ones that actually did the fundraiser got a ticket to sit in the best seats on the floor.

I've been working at this school since the beginning of the year. I yell at a hundred kids every day to make them stop running in the hall, or to reprimand them after they're caught screaming profanities or fighting. They usually look at me like I'm a freak and then continue whatever I told them to stop doing.

I guess it's because they think I'm just a random student like them that just happens to think I can tell them what to do. Because today before I entered the gym, the 8th grade ticket collector asked me if I had a ticket. At first I didn't know what to say and there was an awkward pause as he held out his hand waiting and I jumbled around in my pocket for my district ID badge before I finally said, "Wait, I don't need a ticket. I'm a teacher."

Don't worry. There were several other teachers around who heard the exchange and laughed so hard I thought I was going to have to call an ambulence. It's not like they needed another excuse to make fun of me. I'm already known as just "Baby" by a growing number of the staff. Hilarious.

Home Sick

I'm sick. And not just a little sick. I have a flu virus with the nausea inducing flare and energy of Richard Simmons. It knocked on my door briefly during 4th period Thursday afternoon. But I shrugged it off. A three-day weekend was nearing and I had plans. Big plans. Plans that didn't include going to work and will wrestling with middle school kids. So I went to Pounders with the girls and felt fine. Better than fine. The 4th period glich was almost completely forgotten as I drove home Thursday night singing and car dancing to Vanilla Ice (thanks to my new favorite radio station Movin' 92.5). The next morning I felt fine too. It was Friday. And I was home. I found The Megan Mullally Show and giggled through my first viewing. It ended and I thought about my next move. Would I go see "Stranger Than Fiction" and then go clothes shopping and then drive up to Renton? Or would I go clothes shopping, drive up to Renton and then go see "Stranger Than Fiction" and invite my sister? Decisions... decisions... aaagghhh!!! The pain! The misery! The feeling of millions of very tiny yet very fit (Richard Simmons again) flu viruses hearing the same war cry and biting down in unison. I wanted to die.

I writhed and cried (yes... real tears) as I had visions of popsicles and medicine. But I could barely crawl to the bathroom. There was no way I'd be able to make it to my car. I certainly wouldn't be able to make it to the store and back. Also, there was the whole raining and flooding situation thing going on outside. I called my parents. They pointed out the rain situation and said that if I was still sick tomorrow that they'd bring me medicine. I was still sick the next day.

They brought me medicine. I felt better.

I was still sick Sunday too.

And today I tried to go to work. Well, I did go to work. But I didn't last long. I was asked to go home before the real school day even started. Everyone I know that's had the flu this season says it lasts at least two weeks. I don't have two weeks. I'll be taking my Gatorade, popsicles and medicine to work with me tomorrow. I shouldn't be contagious any more. My fever broke on Saturday. I'll just have to rough it. Four more days until the weekend. Six and a half days until Thanksgiving Break. Almost there...

P.S. Strawberry Garorade tastes just like melted Strawberry Jello. I have mixed feelings about that. Grape's definitely my favorite.

Can I Get That To Go?

Go-Tarts... Are you freaking kidding me?? Aren't Pop-Tarts in nature already technically a "To Go" food? Did they really need to develop a "new" product to make them easier to eat in the car or office? This is really upsetting me. Can you imagine that board meeting? Discussing new product ideas... and some guy in the back raises his hand and says... "Sometimes I want to eat Pop-Tarts in the morning, because as we know it's the perfect breakfast food, but it's hard for me to eat them when I'm on the go if it's not in the traditional "breakfast bar" shape. I propose we make Pop-Tarts more friendly for busy people by making Go-Tarts!" And then everybody cheered. Because, like most people, they'd agree to anything in order to get out of a meeting.

Happy Halloween

Last night Lisa and I almost went to a costume party. I didn't mind missing the party so much. (We got lost somewhere in Redmond... I know... big shocker...) We still met a bunch of people at Red Robin for some good times. And everybody knows that getting dressed up is the best part anyway...

Name the Event...

This is a picture taken sometime between April and August of 2005. I think. In the same roll, there are pictures of Julymas of that year and also pictures from when we dressed up to go to see Star Wars. But for the life of me I can't remember this picture. Do you remember?

It's The Great Praxis, Emmy Lou Who

I got my Praxis results back today. This is the test that another new special ed teacher told me that out of her graduating class (from WSU) of 200, only 2 of them passed it the first time. That's a 1% pass rate. Not good. When I went to take the test, on stand-by, the others there had all failed it once (or twice) and were there trying again.

I had a lot riding on this test, too. If I failed, I would most likely lose my job since a passing score is required to obtain a Washington State Teaching Certificate. Until I get that certificate, I'll be paid as a para-educator. As soon as I get it, I'll be paid retroactively up to my agreed upon salary. So to recap... failing grade = no job, poverty. Passing grade = money, job.

So you can imagine that I was shaking a little bit when I found a letter from ETS in my mailbox this afternoon. Inside was the document on the left. There is a possible 200 points and I got... 200 points. A perfect score! Looks like I'll be paying my rent, eating AND buying a new skirt!

Welcome home, money. Did you miss me?

Also, I watched "It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" tonight. Jealous?

Furthermore, I watched "1 vs 100" tonight for the second time. I don't know if I can watch it anymore, though, because it makes me depressed. Because it shows how stupid Americans are and it makes me embarrassed that it's so flamboyantly displayed. They roped in poor Ken Jennings who has proven that the camera adds at least ten observable pounds to a person's boredom as well. Tonight, a man won thousands of dollars because he knew that Cindy Lou Who was the name of the child from "How the Grinch Stole Christmas." Or at least he could pick it out of an A, B, or C multiple-choice line-up. Genius.

It's The Great Praxis, Emmy Lou Who!

Three-Day Weekend

This past weekend was a 3-day weekend. It was a much needed break. I don't know what it is about 28 middle schoolers but spending time with them is like spending time under the flourescent bulbs in Joe Versus the Volcano. "Suck...(spit sucking sound), suck! Suck, suck, suck!" They drain the life, patience and will to live right out of me. And yet, somehow, I love it. I must really be in the right field if I can come home as tired and drained as I do and yet be excited to see my students again the next day. Vicious circle.
So the idea of getting a day off, an opportunity to sleep a full night in my comfy bed, not worry about the Mt. Rainier sized pile of paperwork on my desk and just read my book (I'm currently reading "The Memory Keeper's Daughter" by Kim Edwards) and see my friends and family... well... it made me rethink the whole committing myself to a mental hospital thing. Rethink but not dismiss entirely.
So, Thursday night I stayed home and watched "The Office" because it's been a giant beam of sunshine in my dreary Northwest job. So, I watched my shows. ("My Name Is Earl" was on that night too.) And I read my book. And I fell asleep without setting my alarm.
Friday morning I stayed in bed until almost 10am reading my book and just loving my bed. I slowly got ready for the day, cleaned my apartment and packed my things for a weekend in Renton. My mom and I spent almost the entire day shopping. I didn't get anything. Well, a package of white socks (which I really needed since flip-flop weather is coming to an end). I picked out a couch that I may or may not actually buy but that I really want. It's a black leather couch that's really cheap and would match my apartment perfectly (mostly because there's nothing in my apartment so there's really nothing that it could possibly clash with). It made me hopeful that soon I'll have a place to sit down at my place and would allow me to invite people over with more to offer than a spot of the carpet. My mom and I bought a Snoopy costume for Mitzi. She hated it. Oreo and Speckles weren't too fond of it either. But I loved it.
Friday night, I watched "Deal or No Deal" with the Faerbers enjoying the pleasant escape from... stuff. Then Saturday, I had a great time chatting with Julie on the sidelines as we watched Preston and then Shelby play in their soccer games. They were kind of precious. Later that night, I finally got to meet little Makenna and see Michelle and her family who I have totally missed. Makenna's even more beautiful in person. I know. It's hard to believe.
On Sunday, I went to my sister's house and we watched the Seahawks game (Did anybody else watch? We won in the last 60 seconds of the game!) and then a disc of season two of "The Office" while we ate lunch. It was pretty much the perfect 3-day weekend. I came back to work this morning relaxed and happy. That lasted for two periods. Halfway through third I was ready to have myself committed again...

But...

Next weekend I'm going to Lopez. So maybe I'll make it through another week... maybe.

Salmon Days

Last weekend I went to Salmon Days in Issaquah. Little Shelby was in the parade for Girl Scouts. She was dressed as a Do-Si-Do cookie. Kind of precious. I also saw a ton of people I haven't seen in forever. It was kind of like being at a giant neighborhood BBQ. Happiness. I hadn't been to Salmon Days since the last time I was actually in the parade. I think I was a high school sophomore.

It's also kind of an interesting experience to grow up some place, move away and then come back because when you come back you suddenly realize that a lot of the things you took for granted as normal actually... aren't. For example, almost everything in the parade had to do with The Puget Sound, Recycling or (of course) Salmon. We are sea-life and environment obsessed. And I love it!

We've Got Spirit! Yes We Do!

Friday was Spirit Day. And I got all dressed up in my school colors of green and gold. I'm definitely a cool teacher.

After my hectic day (we were on assembly schedule which works just fine for most teachers unless you're me and teach all different grades at all different periods which left me with three different classes in my room which made me cram almost twenty 6th, 7th and 8th graders into a half-classroom made for seven) I went out for "drinks with the girls." This was fantastic. I got to hang out with some of my new friends at the school and eat a very delicious cheeseburger. My drink was a Coke. And that was good too. Very cold.

I like cold beverages.

Pajama Day

This is Spirit Week. And today was Pajama Day. So I wore my pajamas. The red and black ones with Scotty Dogs. And a pink bow on the shirt. Because it was the most ridiculous. And I wanted to make my students laugh. But at the end of the day the joke was on me. Because I forgot I had a district meeting right after work. And I forgot to bring a change of clothes. And then I was almost out of gas and had to stop at Costco to get gas (and treats for my students) in my Scotty Dog pajamas.

Tomorrow's Twin Day.

I don't want to talk about it.

Open House

So tonight was our middle school's Open House. Only five (out of 27) of my parents came. One almost broke into tears with concern over her son. One was completely irrate because she felt I wasn't doing enough (remember that school barely started) even though I don't even teach her daughter. One diagnosed ME as ADHD.

"So, your son is actually making good progress. I've been..."
"You have ADHD."
"What?"
"You have ADHD."
"Haha... well, maybe. I hate to sit still! Hahaha."
"No, really. You have ADHD."
"Ok."
"You talk fast and I've been watching you. Your feet are always moving and when you talk you move your hands."
"Well, I'm kind of nervous which is why me feet are fidgity. And my little brother is Deaf so I sign a lot and now I have the annoying habit of moving my hands when I talk. But I can sit still if I will myself to and I have excellent focus... so..."
"You have ADHD."
"Sigh... Ok."

That was the first time I went to an informal IEP meeting and walked away with as the diagnosee.

Side Note: I was at work by 7am and didn't leave until 9:30pm. I got yelled at by my partner teacher/mentor twice for things that were out of my immediate control. My alarm didn't go off when it was supposed to. My car didn't start up right away when I left work tonight. I hate my life.

The Humidity. It's Killing Me.

Last night I was so ridiculously hot. I was wearing shorts and a tank top and had giant fan blowing on me and I was still sweating. I couldn't remember being this hot during this whole Utah summer. Why would I be more hot in Tacoma? My mom called last night to complain about the heat. "Are you hot? I'm hot! It's this darn humidity!" Aha! I had forgotten about that darn humidity!

Even this morning... it's only 55 degrees. But the humidity is at 86%. At the same time, in Provo it's 63 degrees but the humidity is only at 45%.

I think I'd rather have B.

Sweet Sweet Furniture

I got a bed today! Hurray!! I also got my piano. I can't even tell you how happy this makes me. This place is finally starting to look less like a storage unit and more like an apartment.

I also got a job! Yippee! I'll be working in a middle school teaching special education to sixth through eighth graders. They'll all be bigger than me but I think I'll survive. I have the withering mom look down. I'll have to go to work on Monday to set up but I've had the whole summer off so I really can't complain.

It's time to use that beautiful bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils.

It Sucks and It Cuts

I got in a car accident today. I was at the tail end of a three-car pile-up. It was just the icing on the cake, really. Yesterday was my grandma's birthday. The first one of those since she passed away three months ago. We went to the cemetary with flowers. She doesn't even have a headstone yet. More than that, I don't have my WA teaching license yet. There was a bit of a hold-up and it turns out that I took the wrong test. I may not be certified until December. I hope I get to keep my job. My student loan payments are a bit more than I expected. I still haven't gotten paid for working last month because I gave them the wrong apartment number by mistake. I'm living off of my parents' mercy. I have no couch and no bed.

My life. It sucks and it cuts.

Turn it off, man! Turn it off! You're sucking my will to live!

For Rent

Somebody typed in "carnival rides for rent, glendale, az" into Google and found... me. It made me laugh out loud. You know... LOL. Or is that "lots of love" in IM lingo? I don't care. Maybe I'll use it to describe your mom who is a "load of lard." LOL! YMIF!

But I digress. From what topic I don't know. But if there was a clear topic established then there would certainly be digression. Which is a word I just made up, I think. Because when I went to dictionary.com, digression was not a listed form of the word. Huh. But I digress.

My point is... Mr. Ride Renter will find no luck finding what he needs.

My life is certainly a carnival ride... but it's not for rent.

Increased Speed Ahead

This is a sign I saw much too often on my road trip from Provo, UT to Renton, WA. I saw most often in Oregon whose speed was already a national low at 65MPH. It took us forever to get through. Would it have killed them to place an "Increased Speed Ahead" sign on some parts of the highway to make up for lost time?

Home...ish

I'm in Washington! I'm sleeping at my parents' house tonight and then moving into my new apartment tomorrow morning. More exciting news tomorrow. Must sleep...