Royale Confusion

Ouch

Hairspray

Mental Health Day

PostSecret

So I have been fully engulfed in reading the archives of this blog which has been turned into several awesome books that I want to own one day.

People tell some pretty impressive secrets on this thing always on a post card.  And it's all artsy and cool.  I wonder who these people are and whether they're all real secrets.  

Either way, I'm inspired.  I will post a secret of my own for your viewing pleasure.

Chalupa

One year ago today I drove all the way across the Sound to "look" at Chelsea, a dog I had seen on www.petfinder.com (thanks a lot, Kat!) and ended up bringing her home with me.  I had brought my mom along because she didn't think I needed another dog and I figured she could be my voice of reason.  Because she was right.  I didn't need another dog.

But the little dog, all skin and bones, immediately kissed my face  when I met her and just wanted to be held.  And when Taquito came in they were instant best buds.  My mom dug out a pen for me and I signed for her and brought her home the same night.

The vet guessed she was about a year old when I took her in the next day and they needed an estimated birth date for vet records so I decided her adoption day would be a good day.  I dubbed her Chalupa, enrolled her in obedience classes and she's been the most delightful little pain ever since.

I blogged about my dog's birthday.  That just happened!!

My Bedroom

Before:

After:

So Far This Week

Spent 336 minutes doing some type of an aerobic activity (about 20 miles of walking/jogging plus some stuff)

Wrote 4 IEPs.

Led 2 IEP meetings.

Spent 3 hours in after/before hour meetings (unpaid).

Named spider in faculty restroom and posted above sign under his home.

Dropped 2.9 pounds.

Beat level 23 of Dr. Mario on 10th level of diffuculty at medium speed.

Switched to pita pockets.

Saw my nephew three times.

Changed three diapers.

Got thrown up on three times.

Had zero ounces of soda.

Had zero grams of caffiene.

Made a new friend.

Found my teaching certificate. (phew!)

Did my Visiting Teaching.

Got lost... even with the help of my GPS.

Survived.

The I-Haven't-Seen-The-Sun-In-Months Blues

I have to get out of here.

 

Seriously.

Christmas

Christmas has always been a tough time of year for me.  It may stem from the fact that my birthday was often overlooked due to its close proximity to the holiday.  Or could be the fact that holidays like Christmas just seem to exaggerate the family dynamic to an intense degree.  If your family is happy at the core all year then Christmas is extremely happy.  If your family is less happy at the core (or in my case unhappy and messed up) then Christmas is extremely unhappy and messed up.  

Although, most of my Christmas memories are fond ones.  Because the ones I have chosen not to tuck away into the depths of denial are the ones that are centered around my grandmother.  To our tiny family, she was Christmas.  

Our first Christmas without her was in 2006.  It was painful.  Our family talked about it and decided we would try to get around it by changing it up a bit.  We celebrated at a different location, at a different time but kept the main strands of tradition.  It looked different but we all knew what it was.  It was Christmas without grandma and so it wasn't really Christmas at all.

The next year was much of the same.  We changed it around a bit, tried a few new things to see if it would make the new tradition list.  We hardly brought grandma up at all.  Maybe if we didn't talk about it, it would be better.  But all of our not talking about it didn't change the fact that it wasn't Christmas.  It was just our second Christmas without grandma.

Maybe it would have gotten easier as the years went on without a great intervention.  I don't know.  But I doubt it.  It probably would have continued on just the same.  Just the 3rd Christmas without grandma.  Just the 4th Christmas without grandma...

But this year was different.  It wasn't just a Christmas without grandma.  It was Brayden's First Christmas.  We all gathered around the tree like we used to do and we pulled out all of our gifts.  I sat on the floor with my nephew in my lap and I opened his gifts for him.  I shook them like my grandma used to do then flung off the paper.  Our whole family watched and smiled and oohed and awed over the faces he made.  We laughed as he lunged forward to play with his new toys and used his tiny hands to grab at the dancing lights.  Wherever Christmas had gone, it came back from that place with no hard feelings.  

My parents opened their gift from us, a digital frame.  David set it up, right next to the framed photographs of my grandma I had given my sister the year before, and we all took a few minutes to watch the slideshow.  It was packed with photos of Brayden, of the three kids growing up, of the wedding, of our family pets and my grandma.  

I told Brayden who she was and told him that she was probably here right now.  My sister said that Brayden already knew her.  This took us all by surprise a bit because my sister varies on what she believes in from day to day.  She said that three times now, she had been sitting on the sofa near the photos I had given her and Brayden suddenly looked at the photo of her when she was in her early 20's and squealed in delight and apparent recognition and began cooing and laughing as he gazed at the picture.  Each time it lasted several minutes.  Judy said that if it would have happened only once that she probably would have dismissed it.  But now she has no doubts that Brayden and Grandma had some time to talk before he was born and that grandma must be in her early 20's in Heaven.  

With that in mind, we had an even better Christmas.  We more fully realized that Grandma wasn't really gone.  She's still keeping tabs on us.  So it's not really a Christmas without Grandma at all.  It's just Christmas.

Snowed In

I have been snowed in for almost three days now.  There was that traumatic venture onto the roads yesterday but that's it.  I have watched every Christmas movie I own and have had plenty of time to get my Christmas presents wrapped and ready for action.  

Today was my birthday.  I was snowed in once before on my birthday when I was 8 or 9.  I was supposed to have a birthday party but one-by-one my friends called to say they couldn't make it.  I was so bummed and spent the evening watching Frosty the  Snowman alone.  I thought today would be a bummer too.  

But it wasn't.

I got plenty of phone calls and messages from the people  I love.  I had an excuse to hang out in my PJs all day and I enjoyed the peace of a winter's day from my balcony while sipping eggnog.  I thought about my age and some of my more prominent successes and failures.  I thought about the person I've become and about the events and people from my past and current life that has shaped the present me.  It turns out that I'm okay with who I am and found myself immensely grateful for what I have and who I have in my life.

There are people who read this blog.  Some of you have been an audience since I started this thing almost six years ago.  And since it's not all that entertaining or creative and since it doesn't provide anything intellectual or mind boggling you must read this crap because you for some reason or another are curious about what I'm doing and thinking.

So thanks.  Thanks for caring.  You're the people that have helped shape who I am and since I like me it's just more proof that you're good people.  I'm surrounded by good people.  What a great birthday present!  Happy birthday to me!!  :)

Snow and Ice and Some Guy That's Nice

It snowed on Saturday night and Sunday morning.  Not a lot.  But enough to cause problems.  Church was cancelled and everybody was advised to stay home.  The news was full of comical (and some not so comical) reports and video of people thinking driving around the hilly Seattle area on ice was a fine Sunday activity.  It's times like these that I really wish I had a camera crew following me around for your viewing pleasure because this morning I was the idiot and I really don't think words will serve the tale. 

 

This morning we had a 2 hour delay.  I used those two hours to sleep and have a weird dream about showing up to work still in my pajamas and horrifically unshowered and my boss at the book store was the principal and the loonies from the book store were teachers and since it was a snow day hardly any kids showed up and we spent the day playing games and watching movies.  As I slept the snow thawed to create a safer driving situation.  Wait... no.  It didn't.

 

But time was up so I slid and cursed my way to the car armed with my purse, my keys and a water bottle filled with warm water.  I attacked my iced over windshield with the warm water and scraper then sat in my car while it warmed up.  Finally, I put the car in reverse, took a deep breath and started to back up.  So far so good.  My car was now facing up the hill.  I took my foot off the brake... and all hell broke loose.  I started to slide.  I slowly added gas.  Not enough.  I gassed it some more.  Still sliding.  I gave it its all.  I could see the smoke from my burning rubber in my rearview mirror.  I stopped.  Put the emergency brake on and started to think about my options. 

 

That's when the nice guy came over to me and said he was going to help.  I liked him right away because he didn't ask if I needed help.  That was obvious.  He just jumped into action.  He tried pushing my car at first while I tried gassing it again.  That didn't work so he went and got sand and put it in front of and behind all of my tires.  That worked for the few feet he had put sand down and then my car wheels spun again.  But, it did get me far enough up the hill that I could safely back down the rest of the hill and go out the other way.  I was going the wrong way on a one-way street but the guy I almost had a head-on collision with was cool about it. 

 

I slowly made my way down the other side of the hill and to the freeway which was all clear.  I almost had another sliding incident on a hill in the neighborhood of the school but with very few tears and only some minor heart convulsions I made it to work safely.  I turned on my computer and checked my email.  My principal had sent us a message letting us know that we were expected to be at work as close to the regular starting time as possible.  Delays didn't apply to us.  Well, you know what?  They apply to me!  If it's safe enough for me then it's safe enough for buses.  If a bus can't make it then I'm not going to risk it either.  That's the way I roll.  Also, I put in nearly ten extra unpaid hours last week alone making sure my students get the services they need.  I don't think they want to start playing the time counting game.  Also, I'm leaving as soon as the kids are gone.  So there.

My Eye!

My eye is big and red and nasty.  Actually, not the eyeball.  Just the eyelid.  And just my left one.  It had been getting gradually worse and worse over the past few weeks and I eventually relented and went to the doctor when I woke up yesterday morning and couldn't open it at all.  I went into Urgent Care because I didn't want to wait until after Christmas for an appointment.  I kind of wanted my eye back right away.  I'm picky about that kind of thing.

The doctor looked at the thing and had a disgusted look on his face as he said, "Well, it could be a lot of things.  I don't know."  He then wrote me a prescription for some cream, told me to slab it on there twice a day and if the monster gets any bigger to see my regular physician.  Or not.  Maybe a dermatologist.  Or something.

So I went to the pharmacy and they didn't have the stuff and they asked me if I wanted to wait two days to have it shipped in.  I looked at the lady with my one eye and asked her to call around.  Somebody must have this crap.  Somebody did have that crap.  I went to the pharmacy next door, picked the junk up and bolted to the car.  It was only 11am and if I was lucky I could be back to work by 11:30.  

On the road, going 35mph while heading down a windy hill I decided now would be a good time for my first application.  I opened the tube, put a dab on my finger and gently touched it to the mountain that used to be my eye.  And it stung!!!  I mean... STUNG!  I screamed, my car swerved and through the tears in my one eye I did my best to realign my car back between the white and yellow lines.

By noon, I could open my eye a little bit.  I went to work and had a crap of a day.  Seriously.  It was pretty bad.  I almost threw my little teaching notebook down and walked out of there.  Who do they think they are, anyway??

I tried the cream again that night for my second daily application.  It didn't go much better than the first.  The only thing more disturbing than the searing pain that went through the back of my eye, into my head and down my spine was the fact that my matching screams didn't attract a single neighbor to check up on me.  Comforting.

Good news, though.  I can open my eye.  It's ugly.  But it's open.

Drinking Party

I haven't been to a party where alcohol was the main guest since... never.  I've heard about those parties.  Seen pictures of those parties.  Cleaned up after those parties.  Drove some of those partiers home and put them to bed.  But I've never actually been to one of those parties.  I wasn't in the cool crowd in high school and my college years were spent on a dry campus.

 

But I went to one of those parties on Saturday night.  With people twice my age.  On the false pretense that it was a "work" party.  They didn't intend to mislead me.  But they did.  It started at 6pm.  We were asked to bring cookies, appetizers and a white elephant gift and were told to be prepared for some karaoke madness.  We were told to bring our own alcohol if desired but that soda would be provided.  I had to work until 7 and the lady's house was 45 min away so I told them I'd be late.  I brought cookies and a white elephant gift just in case but I figured I'd probably miss the cookie and gift exchange.  But I'd still get to see some old friends before everybody headed out for the night.  So the trip would be worth it.

 

It was.  It was really worth it. 

 

When I walked in, I recognized only one face... the face of our hostess.  She said the others would be coming in a bit.  I waited.  And waited.  The 6 or 7 guests drank and drank and the karaoke performances got more and more entertaining.  Still I waited.  Finally one face I knew showed up.  Then hours later 3 more.  By this time people were falling down, story lines sounded like something out of Alice's Wonderland and the beverages were running low.

 

We finally exchanged gifts and cookies which I had to heavily help facilitate because they couldn't remember the rules but were adament about playing.  The neighbor was half carried home and put in bed only to pop back in ten minutes later forgetting why she had gone home.  One guy outed his buddy to his fiance about his allegid marijuana use which turned out to be the highlight of my night besides the times the same guy shoved a mic in my face saying, "Wanna sing?  Sing!  Come on!  No?!  Alright then!" and then, before I could respond, went on to sing a song from The King and I.

 

Getting to know you... gettig to know all about you...

 

Brilliant.

XY Mishap

At Claim Jumper last night I found myself in the wrong restroom.  I swear to you that I looked at the signs first.  I walked in and the tiles were blue and there were urinals lining the wall.  I stood there for a second while it all sunk in.  When I left the restroom to rectify my mistake there were two men staring at me.  Apparently they had watched me go in and were waiting for me to realize my mistake before they entered.  They got a good laugh.

If only it didn't happy so often...

Wayne's Elf Dance

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Saturday at Southcenter

I was at the mall last night during the whole crazy ordeal.  I left the food court minutes before the gunfire.  Talk about your scary moments!

Brag

I don't have a whole lot to brag about.  I'm 27 and already an old schoolmarm.  I spent Monday night playing musical chairs and breaking a pinata with singles obviously much younger than myself.  I... am not awesome.

But... my nephew is.  So just let me brag for a minute and pretend that I have anything to do with my nephew's awesomeness. 

As you can see, he's smiling now.  A lot actually.  And he can almost laugh.  Right now it's more of quick intakes of breath in fast succession.

Most things amuse him.  A tickle, his Mariner Moose mobile, my face.  He also finds himself very handsome and stares at himself in the mirror and smiles.

Between the hours of 6 and 8 pm he kind of loses his cool.  We're not sure why but he becomes very grumpy every night right on schedule. Nothing amuses him then.  Except for water.  He loves the water.  As soon as he's placed in the bath he's back to cooing happily and kicking his feet as if he were born to swim.  Maybe he was.

Also, B hates traffic and unapologetically slow baristas.  Just like his Auntie Em.  He hates it so much he screams.  Just like his Auntie Em wishes she could.  But when I hold him and tell him that I understand (because I do) he calms down and smiles again.  And it makes my heart happy.

Tagged

I was double tagged by Andrea and Michelle.

Here are the rules:

1. Link the person who tagged you.

2. Mention the rules on your blog.

3. Tell about six quirks you have.

4. Tag six fellow bloggers to do the same.

5. Leave a comment to let them know.

Quirk #1

I don't sleep well with socks on.  If my feet are cold I'll wrap them in a throw blanket under the covers so it's easier to kick off the extra layers if they get hot.  I sleep better with a hoodie with the hood up.

Quirk #2

I have an unnatural obsession over Disney movies, Disney characters and Disneyland.  I am a toddler.

Quirk #3

I love Mexican food more than any other food.  The margin is large.  Without exaggerating, 7 out of 10 meals would be considered "Mexican" meaning the main ingredients are salsa, beans (refried or black), tortilla and hot sauce.

Quirk #4

I love chocolate.  I love fruit.  But I feel strongly about them not touching.

Quirk #5

I like the smell of cigarette smoke (most brands... also cigars).  It's a good thing I never tried it.

Quirk #6

I don't dance in public.  But I do dance.  A lot more actually now that I live alone.  I'm also a big fan of the car dance.

I tag Heather (you'll have to do it for Andrea anyway!), Sarah (you'll have to do it for Michelle anyway!), Kat, Ann-Marie, Leah and Lisa.

Ozzie!!!!

It occurred to me yesterday that I may have the goods to be Sharon Osbourne for Halloween.

I bought this wig a few weeks ago just because I can't leave Walmart without buying at least one random, completely useless item. But right in the middle of one of my math lessons yesterday it occurred to me that Sharon Osbourne had hair just like that for a while. Think I can pull it off?

She has those annoying little Pomeranians but my dogs are small enough to take the part.

Too bad my students won't have any clue as to who I'm portraying. But the other teachers might appreciate it.

Ozzie!!!!