I'm a huge dork. But I wasn't always like this. I used to be an even bigger dork. Dorky and shy. I didn't say a word until the 7th grade. That's when I became the ringleader of my dorky group of friends. Wow... good times. By 8th grade I was confident and comfortable with my dorkiness. But 9th grade... wow... that's high school and I got really scared again. But I had a plan. Keep the mouth zipped and move in the shadows. A person not noticed is a person not violated.
So it's my first day of high school. I'm walking through the old cafeteria/big room thing (I don't remember what we called it). The first bell rang and I started off to find my first class. I was walking behind two very large senior football players. (They cast a very big shadow and following them seemed to fit right into my plan of being unnoticed.) We approached the doors to lead outside. They each threw open the doors. Small catch... the middle divider of the two doors had been ripped out (probably by the same guys that were ahead of me) and so I walked right threw the middle and WAM! Both doors hit me at the same time and I... well... I was stuck. Arms pinned against my body, I wasn't going anywhere. My yelp of surprise made the two guys ahead of me turn around and then it was all over. Low, hardy chuckles erupted and heads turned as they each yanked a shoulder to pull me free. "Wow, didn't see you back there. You're short. How tall are you? You must be a freshman. Think you'll grow?" A few quick mumbles of thanks for my freedom and I darted off to see what else could possibly go wrong in high school.
So then years later it's college graduation day. Waiting for over an hour before the ceremony began gave me an opportunity to make a few new friends. The girls were nice and we chatted through the ceremony (what were their names again?). But somehow between our chairs and the stage we got all messed up and I ended up next to the biggest guy I've ever seen. We walk across the stage and he follows behind, I trip on my gown and he catches me and then we sit down in our seats (well, I sat on the right half of my seat and let him seep onto the other half) and he turns and in a deep voice he says, "Hehe... you're small. How tall are you?"
"Hahaha! I'm 7'3"."
"Cool. That's... neat..."
It amuses me that my height amuses others. That's all.
my little homophobe
10 months ago