BS Royalty

Class was boring. We had to look at test results and then as a group classify (or give reasons for not classifying) a hypothetical student with a special education classification. I got voted as the "speaker" for our group because they said I said, "Uh... it depends..." in the most intelligent manner.

The teacher said she was impressed.

I sat down and starting reading blogs. Some were pretty funny and sometimes I chorkled out loud. Obviously not paying attention. There were six more groups to sit through... all the same... "Uh... it depends..."

I heard the teacher say, "Uh... what's her name?" Was she talking about me? I looked up. "Emily," they said. "Oh, Emily... what do you think about this?"

I had no idea what they were talking about. "Uh... well... let's see... well... like I said before, the numbers displayed here are all well and good and sure, they give us a good idea of what the child's cognitive ability is and a general idea of the knowledge they've acquired so far... but it's hard to say if the child has an actual learning disability based on these numbers alone. I mean, is it really a communication disorder or is it because the child is Spanish speaking and new to the country? Can this individual child benefit from special services or would it actually have negative effects taking him out of a general education classroom where he'll be exposed to a wider variety of opportunities to expand his vocabulary? It all comes down to knowing the child, observing him in class, asking his parents how he does at home and looking at his classroom work and behavior. Every child is different." (a.k.a "It depends...")

"Wow! You obviously has a lot of background knowledge in this sort of situation."

"Sure."

I turned to my neighbor, "Is that what we were talking about?"

"Yes. I didn't think you were paying attention."

"I wasn't."

Obviously, reading was too distracting. So I played some internet games that I could still kind of listen to what was being talked about in class. But not really. Because soon the room fell silent again and all eyes were on me again.

"My turn to talk again?"

The teacher nodded.

I said, "Uh... It depends..." using some other terms I pulled out of nowhere.

The teacher said "Wow!" again. My classmates applauded. They actually applauded my BS answer!

I am the Queen of BS!!