I'm Awake.

Notice what time this was posted because I just barely woke up. Granted, I didn't go to bed until a little after 2am. But still... I slept for nine and half hours. That's a lot of sleep.

And I liked it.

A Different Look

I dyed my hair. It's dark brown. Closer to my original hair color. But according to this quiz, I made the wrong decision...

Your Hair Should Be Orange

Expressive, deep, and one of a kind. You pull off "weird" well - hardly anyone notices.

What's Your Funky Inner Hair Color?

Guys Like Girls With Skills

My sister and I emailed each other every couple of minutes yesterday. I was concerned about the fact that her new heart medication was making her drowsy and asked how she was getting to work...

Judy: David and I drive in to work together everyday, so he is always driving.
It is nice that we can carpool He thinks I am a horrible driver anyway. :)

Em: Haha! My friends think I'm a terrible driver, too. It must be
genetic. Let's just hope we're never as bad as mom. :)

Judy: Funny you say that, because I think that I drive fine. I do make a
conscious effort to drive carefully and EVERYONE says I am a sucky driver.
Maybe it is genetic.

Em: Same here. I never see a problem with how I drive. It's not like I
get tickets or get in lots of accidents or anything. And yet my
friends always say my driving scares them. Hmmmm. I have a T-shirt
of a little girl with pigtails who can barely see over the steering
wheel and says "I can't drive" in bubble letters above her. My
friends laugh really hard when I wear it.

Judy: HMMM, well isn't that interesting. I wonder why that is. I guess we are
not alone. :)

Drive Carefully

On opening day this is the picture I found worthy of forcing my brother to hang out the window of our parents' giant blue van to photograph. It's also the picture that I don't regret even after the window got stuck in the down position and resulted in a very long, very cold and very wet ride back to Renton.

It was worth it. Right?

Pillow to Parking Lot

I woke up this morning on my own. My bedroom was filled with light and I lazily looked at my cell phone/alarm clock.

7:27am

I blinked a couple of times and looked again.

7:27am

It couldn't be! I had set my alarm for 6:20am. I was supposed to be at the University Mall Parking Lot at 7:30am. I jumped out of bed, pulled on some clothes from my floor, brushed my teeth, grabbed my make-up bag, conference bag and slipped on my shoes as I ran out the door.

I drove as quickly as I dared and pulled into my parking space at... 7:36am.

NINE MINUTES from pillow to parking lot. Nine.

I brushed my hair as the last carpooler came into view. And then we were off. My make-up was done before we hit the freeway and 45 minutes later I was in the Salt Palace in Salt Lake City listening to some boring presentation about ELL, DIBELS and IEPs.

Nine minutes! I'm speedy. Really speedy.

Sports Fans

I don't know when it happened. But it happened. My family is a family of sports fans. If it could happen to us, it could happen to anyone. If you would have told me when I was ten that one day I'd be sitting at my sister's house with my whole family watching the Mariner's game, I would have laughed.

Even back then I liked the Mariners. I went to a few games every now and then if my friend's family was going and happened to have an extra ticket but I wasn't obsessed. I was a softball player. I liked watching the strategies I learned being played out by the pros. But I wasn't the kind of kid that knew all of the players' names, positions and stats. I just liked to watch every now and again.

My sister and I didn't take much interest in the Sonics or the Seahawks either. We were girls. More interested in manipulating our parents into buying us new shoes. And my dad was never into it either. We tried sometimes to get him interested. Especially around Christmas or his birthday when it came time to buy him a gift. It would make shopping so much easier if he would just have an obsession with football like the other girls' dads. Their shopping gets done so quickly. But our dad was more into weather statistics, almanacs and encyclopedias. And we learned to love that.

We were a famiy without sport. And it seemed to work for us. But then something happened.

1) My brother turned 12 and he suddenly decided that he loved the Mariners. With a fiery passion. He MUST watch every game, own every bit of merchandise and express support for him team by attending at least ten games a season. And he wasn't about to do it alone. Somebody had to watch with him. Sometimes he even held my dad down and forced him to watch with him.

2) My dad finally decided that he might as well just sit there since Wayne was too big to give him much hope that he'd let it go. And he learned to love the game too. He learned all the seasonal stats. He was a Mariners fan.

3) My grandma moved in. Apparantly she'd been harboring a secret love for the Mariners because she insisted on the game being on and if she ever found out that there was a game on and she didn't get to see it she became unbearably crankly.

4) My mom doesn't like to be left out. So she did what she had to do to be included. She bought Mariners T-shirts, key chains, hats and blankets. She puts them all on for game day and tries to outcheer everybody else.

5) My sister dated and married a huge sports fan. David is majorly obsessed with the Mariners, Seahawks, Sonics, our hockey team and other local teams I've never heard of. He loves it. And my sister loves him. And now she loves the sports.

6) I went to college and decided I had to buy a Sports Pass to be cool. So I learned all of the rules for football. And then every email I got from my brother was about the Mariners and so I had to learn about the Mariners to be cool. And then their disease spread to the Sonics and Seahawks and I had to learn about and watch them to be cool.

And so our family is a family of sports fans. And we spent the whole evening yesterday watching the Mariners beat the Angels. We cheered, compared known stats and personal opinion about each player and tried to decide how the season would go. I have to admit that it was really nice. There we all were, spending hours of time together in a small room and there was no yelling or bloodshed or tears. We should have gotten into sports a long time ago.

Opening Day

I went to the Mariner's game today with my brother. It included...

* Parking 1.3 miles away from the stadium in order to park for free in a shady alley by the train tracks
* A #3 meal at Jack in the Box
* Noseblead seats at Safeco (next to a Japanese family of four (visiting from Japan for vacation) that chanted, cheered, clapped and video taped every moment that involved Ichiro Suzuki or Kenji Johjima who happen to be our only two Japanese players AND our only two good players)
* Half a bag of Starburst jellybeans
* A chocolate chip Dipp bar
* Garlic fries
* New digital camera experimentation
* Yet more Starburst jellybeans
* A disappointing loss in the 9th inning
* Another 1.3 mile walk back to the van
* With a short stop in at Krispy Kreme for a donut and a Coke
* Convincing my brother during traffic to hang out the window and take a picture of an amusing sign
* Consequently having the window get stuck in the down position on my brother's side (making a very chilly ride home since it was raining and we had a ways to go on the freeway)
* Stopping at Krispy Kreme again on the way home because my brother let it slip to my dad that we had gone there and we would be shunned if we showed up without a few extras

But believe it or not, all of these things added together equalled fun. Opening day was a good day.

24

After walking out of Safeway together I noticed that 24 Hour Fitness had moved into the store next door.
Me: Hey mom, when did 24 move in?
Mom: Oh, just a few weeks ago. That's the gym your brother wants to join once he gets here.
Me: Huh. I used to be a member of 24. I liked it. At least I'm sure I would have if I ever actually went.
Mom: I'm hoping that he'll get up in the morning and go instead of sleeping in until 1pm every day.
Me: That would be good.
Mom: Maybe I can wake him up early and bug him until he goes to the gym.
Me: Maybe.
Mom: We should go ask them what time they open.
Me: (blank stare)
Mom: Because if they're open before 8 then we should go sign him up right now and I can get him up early. Wanna go over with me and ask when they open?
Me: Mom... it's called 24 Hour Fitness.
Mom: I know. It's that gym right there. (she points to the gym)
Me: Yes, so they're open 24 hours a day. It's not just a clever name.
Mom: Well how was I supposed to know why it was called 24 Hour Fitness?!
Me: I dunno, Mom. Life is hard.

The Tacoma Aroma

Tacoma is located about 40 minutes south of my parents' house in Renton. And it's about 15 minutes north of Lakewood. Tacoma used to get a lot of flack for it's ominous odor. The old paper mill filled the air with death. We called it the Tacoma Aroma. And it was bad. But now the paper mill has closed its doors (I believe there were villagers with pitchforks involved) and the old cereal mill closed too. And a few other gross mills. So the odor has lifted and left in its place a shimmer of hope that smells nothing of death. And I'm going to live there. If I have my way I'll be living right off the pier near the museum. My very own place. I signed a contract with Clover Park School District which is located in Lakewood. I feel okay about it. A new job. A new apartment. A new city. And it smells nothing of death.

What I Really Want

I leave for Seattle tomorrow. Way early. Early as in my flight leaves at 6:50am kind of early. Tomorrow I'll look at a district I might work at next school year. I don't know if I want to work there. I probably won't know still even after I look at the school and meet people. Because I never know what I want. For example, what do I want to wear tomorrow for the big day? I don't know. I just don't know...

Me, Me, Me

In response to H...

Five Movies You Can Watch Over and Over:
1. Bringing Up Baby
2. Sleepless in Seattle
3. Christmas Vacation
4. Joe Versus the Volcano
5. Mixed Nuts


Five embarrassing Songs that You Know All the Words To:
1. "Hero" by Mariah Carey
2. "Cleanin Out My Closet" by Eminem
3. "Ice, Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice
4. "Wind Beneath My Wings" by Mette Midler
5. "You're So Vain" by Carley Simon


Five Memorable Halloween Costumes:
1. Clown, ages 5-12 (my mom made it so she made me wear it until I outgrew it... I never did)
2. Blade, age 21?
3. Punk Rocker, age 22?
4. Piece of Pizza, age 25
5. Spirit of Christmas, age 25


Five Celebrities You Believe May Secretly be Alien:
1. Kelly Osbourne
2. Britney Spears' baby
3. Ryan Seacrest
4. Michael Jackson
5. Tom Cruise


Five Occupations that You Know You Could Never Do:
1. Military anything. I have a problem with weapons.
2. Custodian/Garbage Woman. I throw up easily.
3. Politician. I'm wishy washy.
4. Telemarketer/Door-to-Door Salesman. Terrifying. Seriously.
5. Construction. I don't do heavy-lifting or sign-lifting


Five Books You've Recently Read Outside of Schoolwork:
1. An Idiot Girl's Christmas, Laurie Notaro
2. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Mark Twain
3. The Penultimate Peril, Lemony Snicket
4. Ramona Forever, Beverly Cleary
5. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, J.K. Rowling


Five Ways to Perfectly Spend an Afternoon:
1. Playing catch
2. At the park
3. Walking
4. In a book store
5. With a good book


Five Lines You Blatantly Stole From a Movie, TV, a Commercial, or Song:
1. "I just wish you weren't such a liar" - Will Ferrell, SNL
2. "Surprised? If I woke up with my head sewn to the carpet I wouldn't be more surprised than I am right now." - Christmas Vacation
3. "I like whispering too!" - Elf
4. "I want! I want! I need! I need!" - "What About Bob?"
5. "I invented the piano key neck-tie! What've you got?? Nothing! NOTHING!!" - Zoolander


Not Your 5 Favorite Foods, But the 5 You're Most Likely Eating:
1. Diet Pepsi
2. Chips and Salsa
3. Chocolate Slim Fast
4. Snickers Bar
5. Salad


Five People Who Must Immediately Respond:
1. Ritz
2. Nama
3. Ann-Marie
4. Leah
5. Jon

Happy Holi

I went to the Krishna Temple last night to celebrate Holi. Here are some pictures from the event. We threw color on each other, danced around a huge bon fire, chanted and danced. I think I love it.

Ma

I called my mom tonight.

She made me listen to her dog snore.

It's Over!

We're through! Utah and I are done! We're breaking up! My eyes are puffy. I didn't sleep because apparantly I'm sick. And I'm grouchy. And all crampy. And I fell asleep with wet hair so my hair's all big and frumpy. And I had to wear my glasses today because my contacts couldn't squeeze between my puffy eyes. I'm ugly frump girl who may or may not stink because my nose is too stuffed to smell.

And THEN do you know what happened? I walked outside. Comforting, warm, lovely, healing Spring is just around the corner but it was SNOWING! And not just a little bit. A LOT! A LOT! A LOT!! And so Utah and I are THROUGH! THROUGH! THROUGH!! I've had it! We're done!! Adios! Take your promises of hot summers, your uncannily large population of single men and your cheap rent and GO!

Moonlighting

Last night I dreamed that I was a waitress. A brand new to the job sort of waitress. I had no idea what was on the menu, what drinks we offered or where the kitchen was.

I came in and was directed to serve a table by the wall. There was a young couple there. I asked them if I could get them something to drink. The guy started to talk and ordered what sounded like five drinks, although he got frustrated when I didn't know when the name of one drink ended and another started. I decided to just write it down and ask a kitchen staff person once I found it.

I turned to find the kitchen, turned back to the table for just a moment and realized that four more people were there. I decided to take their drinks down so I could get them all at once. Got the orders, turned for a moment and five more people were there.

By the end of the dream, the table was as long as a banquet hall and it was filled with angry customers. I couldn't get the orders down right, I kept losing the little slips of paper which would fall to the floor and then disappear, people at one end of the table would take forever deciding while people on the opposite end grew restless.

I didn't fill a single order all night and I'll bet that if I had stayed around long enough my tip would have been a bucket of tar and feathers.

I'm not a great dream analyzer. But I don't think I need to be. The message of this dream is clear.

I should never be a waitress.

Oops. I Did It Again.

February 3rd. That was the date of my blogiversary. Yep, I started this sucker on February 3, 2003. And I forgot. Again. My little baby has grown into a destructive toddler. I have officially closed the door on the "Terrible Twos" and have opened the door to the "Maybe Something Less Terrible Threes". Don't worry. It's a working title. I'm open to suggestions. As long as nothing in the title rhymes with the word "three" because I don't know if I can handle it. Something with the "th" sound might be appropriate. Just a suggestion.

My point is, my blog is getting older. Like me. And I think that maybe it needs a little something. Maybe an official mascot. Or a poster child. Perhaps a list of testimonials from some of my fans about how my blog has changed your life. Preferably for the better. But I'm not picky.

Or maybe, just maybe, I could start a Weekly Dear Emmy post. I'd give you the opportunity to email me with your deep-rooted very serious life questions. I would then choose one each week, post it on my blog and respond in a way that would make you wonder if I actually read your email at all and leave you to ponder placing me under professional supervision. Which would, of course, make your problems look not so deep-rooted and serious any more because at least your life is comparitively normal and you can more fully value your stronger grip on reality. See? I'm helping.

Happy Birthday, Blog!

A Carnival Ride

I went to the BYU Job Fair today and not meaning to brag or as my mom would say, "toot my own horn" I was HOT! There were seven interviews. One more scheduled for tomorrow. Three more phone interviews scheduled for next week. Two districts wanted me to sign a contract right then and there. At one point two (maybe three?) districts got in a salary/benefits/living situation battle over me and I found it necessary to leave when I was asked which one of them I thought could make me the most comfortable. Because I was creeped out. And because I never thought I'd see the day that Glendale, AZ and Los Angeles, CA would be in the same boxing ring.

But here's my point. I found out that I'm bad at making decisions. Duh. I know. But I at least thought I'd be happier with lots of options and knowing I could go anywhere. But, I'm not. I like to be told what to do.

I also found out that I'm smart. And that I have something to offer. And that any district should be damned lucky to have me!

I'm good enough. I'm smart enough. And gosh darnit... people like me!

My Mental Health

It's bad. Real bad.
Last night I discussed for over 45 minutes the lives of several?fictional characters in detail with concern and compassion I hold for?few real characters I see every day.
I swear in shock and dismay at the same time every day as I turn the?corner after my lunch break to see a spot that could easily fit two?parallel parked cars holding the same single teal Geo leaving just?enough space for my car on either end of it if my car didn't have any?bumpers forcing me to park a block away since the parking lot is also?full and this poor parallel parking displayed by the Geo is apparantly?an epidemic.
Although my teaching schedule usually runs with military accuracy I?keep picking up my students and dismissing them at random and very?wrong times leading up to today where I dismissed three young students?almost an hour early.
I whined and complained for two weeks that I didn't have any money and?saw everything I needed and couldn't afford and yet I haven't spent a?single dime since I got paid three days ago and suddenly lost all?desire to purchase anything which left me sitting in my basement alone?eating stale tortilla chips and ignoring the "refrigerate after?opening" label on the salsa I opened four days ago and left on my?basement table as I watched old seasons of the Gilmore Girls.
I have spent a great deal cussing out Old Man Winter and his stupid?snow, stupid ice and stupid cold and have even a few times shaken my?fists with rage as I pictured him on a beach drinking Martinis and?laughing with ET and a few of Santa's disgruntled elves as they?watched me scrape ice off my window.
The staggering evidence of my poor mental health leads me to only one?dash of hope. This weekend is a three-day weekend. I need heat, I?need love, I need sanity. I need, I need, I need!

Stupid Rodent!

The dumb thing saw its shadow! Six more weeks of
winter. But, really... what did we expect? Out of
the 110 recorded Punxsutawney Phil appearances he has
seen his shadow 96 times. So, 87% of the time he just
guesses that there'll be six more weeks of winter.
Jerk.

AND! Apparantly the furry freak is a Steeler's fan!

Well, at least the movie's good.

http://www.cnn.com/2006/WEATHER/02/02/groundhog.day.ap/index.html

That Time of the Month

It's that time of the month again. The time right before pay day. It's usually the week before pay day. But this month, I'm a week early. So this time I have two weeks of the purest form of poverty.

My dad sent me an email yesterday to remind me how much money I'd need to conjure up to make rent. It wasn't a small amount. But after I deposited the money from my roommates for last month's utilities and all the money I could scrounge up from my purse... well... I still came up $30 short. Oops.

I sent my dad a reply this afternoon to tell him not to worry. That I had a game plan. So please don't yell at me, offer to give me money and then think of new and inventive ways to hold it over my head. I'd rather pay the overdraft charge, thank you very much.

But then, as American Idol rolled its credits it came to me. Like a light shining down from heaven. I still haven't unpacked my suitcase from Christmas break. And inside that suitcase may or may not be some Christmas/birthday money from Grandma! And you know what? There was! $20 for my birthday + $20 for Christmas = rent!

I love you, Grandma.

I called my dad to tell him the good news. He hadn't gotten my e-mail earlier. "So... wait... you found $40?"
"Ya! My birthday and Christmas money. I'll deposit it tomorrow during my lunch break and my rent check will be covered."
"Oh, good. Wait, so that $40 is just extra?"
"Extra? No. What do you mean by extra?"
"After rent is paid, how much will you have to live off of until pay day?"
"Nothing."

My dad laughed. Really, really hard. I actually hadn't heard him laugh that hard since he made the joke about the doctor removing my eyes. This guy was really enjoying my misery.

"Nothing? Hahaha! You'll have nothing?!" He couldn't get enough! "I'm sorry. It's just the way you said 'nothing' and the idea of you having absolutely nothing. Oh, the way you kids live!"
"Ya, it's a hoot dad. Poverty is funny."

He couldn't stop laughing so I finally told him I had to go and that he was free to call me back when he caught his breath and dried his eyes. When I hung up, I laughed too. He's right. It is kind of funny that I have nothing. I really know how to live a joke.