Wednesday, November 12, 2003

Debbie

Today was a wretched day. And it's all Debbie's fault. You know, usually I have good associations with the name Debbie due to the fact that "Little Debbie" brings so much joy to millions of people all over the world. This Debbie, however, does not. Quite the contrary actually. Because this Debbie is crazy.

Debbie works at the elementary school with me and she tutors kids one-to-one all day long. This is what I do in the afternoons. Debbie sets up shop in the library and stays in the same tiny area all day long. Debbie thinks this is hard and whines to me about it a lot. "Hi Emily. Do you work all day, too? It's hard, huh?"

It's not hard.

We've recently run into some issues. Sara, my friend who also tutors in the afternoon witnessed a disturbing scene the other day when Debbie got in a fight with one of her students. She makes the kids tell her that she's nice and that they love her. She's mean to them and says she does it because she loves them and wants them to be safe, smart and happy. Debbie's a twisted human being. She's manipulative to the max. The kid came in with a cough and this is what followed...

Debbie: Are you still sick?
Kid: Kinda. Got this little cough.
D: But it's been like a week!
K: Ya.
D: Are you taking medicine or anything?
K: Nah, my mom says I don't need anything. I'm fine.
D: NO! That's not okay! You've been sick for a WEEK! Your mom is wrong! I love you and want you to be better!
K: That's something between me and my mom. I'm not that sick.
D: It is about me too! I'm your tutor and I love you! I see you every day and I want you to be better! I'll talk to your teacher and the principal about this! Your mom is wrong! Here, I have some pills in my purse. (She pulls out some pills.) Take it.
K: No, thank you. I don't want to.
D: Take it!!
K: No, I don't need it. I'm not going to.
D: Don't talk back to me!!

And so the session continued. The twisted, twisted session. The kid got upset. Debbie caught on and said, "Here, I'll only make you read two words instead of the whole list and you can read to yourself instead of out loud to me. Aren't I nice? I don't let all the kids do that but you're special. I'm nice, right?" The kid was scared and so he said, "Ya."

So Sara told me this story at recess and asked if I would sit by Debbie today to see what I thought about it before we reported it to our supervisor. I set up shop by where Debbie usually is and waited. Soon enough in came little Ramos. Debbie was manipulative and bossy but not too bad. But at the end she made the girl give her a hug. She looked so uncomfortable. I felt bad. Then in came the kid that Sara had seen yesterday. They started their session. The kid has a hard time reading (which is why he needs tutoring in the first place) because he reads too fast and skips over words. Instead of helping him slow down and showing him what he missed, Debbie just tells him he's wrong and makes him read it over and over again until finally she gives a deep sigh and tells him to move on. He does and then she shouts, "No! Go back and do it again!" He looks at her scared and says, "But you told me to move on." Debbie's ticked, "DON'T TALK BACK TO ME!! I'll take you to the principal and my supervisor! I'm sick of this! If I were your teacher you wouldn't talk back to me!" The kid started to cry (he's in the 6th grade) and Debbie told him to just go back to class and cool out. He got up to go when suddenly Debbie must have realized it's not a good idea to send a crying child back to class. "Wait!" she called. She chased after him and said, "I'm sorry. It's just that I love you and want you to be a good reader. Why do you talk back to me when I correct you?" They went and sat back down. He told her that she made him feel stupid. And she kept repeating that she loved him. She laid down ground rules (1. He couldn't talk back. 2. He had to do what she said and 3. They needed to have more fun together) and told him that if he followed them for a week he'd get a prize and then another one for reading. "See? I'll be giving you two prizes! I'm nice, right? Tell me I'm nice!"

It was like watching my own childhood and I just wanted to take the poor child away. She was so random. She was mean. She was manipulative. And she made kids hug her and tell her she was nice and that they love her. It was all too sick and twisted for me and I was shaking and wanted to throw up. I let my student leave early because he was doing such a great job and also because my mind was swimming. Debbie came up to me.

Debbie: Sorry you had to see that.
Em: Ya, me too.
D: It's just that he always talks back. He's such a problem.
E: I actually didn't hear him talk back.
D: Well you didn't hear everything! He DID!
E: I was sitting right next to you. I heard everything. He wasn't talking back. He was just a bit frustrated.
D: Yes he was! You didn't hear everything!
E: I gotta go. (Debbie walked away. I packed up.)
D: (Comes back as I'm leaving.) I'm sorry if I offended you.
E: I gotta go.

I was shaking like crazy and I had to work not to throw up. I could feel tears coming to my eyes and I just wanted to get out of there. Amy, my supervisor saw me. We had a chat with Sara and the principal about it. The whole thing just freaked me out and I never want to see that woman again. I never want her to be around kids again. I just never want to experience that again. Oh, gosh... here come the holidays...

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